bestseller
Borat Shirt
€ 19.99
an application for the position of
Girlfriend Application
A highly competitive process. One position available.
Begin Application →A brief, humble overview of my accomplishments. ↓ scroll ↓
The Apollo Mission
In my earlier years I served as the Head of NASA during the Apollo missions, where I oversaw the operation that landed the first man on the moon. Pictured here is the moment I celebrated pulling it off.
Borat
I directed all of the Borat films and authored the majority of the most celebrated jokes. Sacha and I remain close friends to this day. Pictured here: the two of us on set collaborating on the script.
First Person on the Moon
I was also the first human to set foot on the lunar surface, and the one who coined the immortal line: "one small step for me, one giant leap for mankind." Shown here enjoying a pleasant afternoon in the sun on the moon.
Helping Children in Africa
I love helping other people, so once a week I fly to Africa to feed a great many children. You can see me carrying out that work here.
Volunteering at the Dog Shelter
I love helping other animals as well, so once a week I fly across the country to various animal shelters to do volunteer work. I take no compensation — I already have more than enough. Shown here caring for a few of the wonderful dogs.
Miss Netherlands
Someone once remarked that I would also look stunning as a woman, so I entered the Dutch national beauty pageant. As you can see here, I won.
Mr. Olympia
I work out from time to time. A friend entered me into the Mr. Olympia contest on a whim — I ended up winning. Pictured here is my posing round in front of the judges.
Neurosurgeon
When I'm not volunteering, I practice neurosurgery in my spare time. I picked it up as a hobby, but I've since been nominated for Neurosurgeon of the Year 2026. Because I'm already very wealthy, I donate the modest income from this work to shelters that prepare meals for the homeless. Pictured here: saving a patient's life.
Queen
Following the Apollo missions I grew a little restless, so I formed a band and became its lead singer. Pictured here: performing live with my band, Queen.
Official merchandise. Hand-selected. Limited runs. ↓ scroll ↓
bestseller
steF OFF Hat
€ 24.99
limited
Portrait of Stef Is The Best
€ 50.00
Ceramic Coffee Mug
€ 18.99
Men's Underpants
€ 25.00
sold out
Women's Underpants
€ 25.00
◆
Chapter III
The Application
Please answer every question truthfully. All responses are reviewed personally.
